I tell her, “Baby, I want you to know how much your daddy loves you. And though he can’t be here right now, he’s thinking of you.”

Does he tell the truth or lie?
Does he know it’s do or die?
I guess it’s just you and I….
Baby – please don’t cry.
It’ll be all right…
Mama’s gonna fight.
And I’ll hold you tight.
We’ll sleep sound tonight.

I’m like, I don’t want to be the bad guy, / but, I don’t want to tell her these lies. I thought he was mysterious – must of been delirious. / Turns out this drug dealer was / just too high to speak. / And when we sobered up a bit, / realized that we were pregnant, / and I have to raise a kid / with my flavor of the week. Things sucked back then, / I cheated on him / with guys he called friends, / but they weren’t. / It was all just for fun, / till dude stole his gun. / Things came undone / and it hurt. I felt abused and abusive, / misused and intrusive. / Now I look at him / like here we go again. / Who I was back then factors in, / because if it weren’t for that sin / this never would have happened. / He feels backed in to a corner. / I feel trapped into a mourner: / a victim of a sick sin, a battle between kin. / And now it’s a question of draw, lose or win.

Does he tell the truth or lie?
Does he know it’s do or die?
I guess it’s just you and I….
Baby – please don’t cry.
It’ll be all right…
Mama’s gonna fight.
And I’ll hold you tight.
We’ll sleep sound tonight.

But, that was then and this is now. / This is what and that was how. / Now we’ve got to go to court. / And I’m feeling out of sort. / Comments like that don’t deserve a retort, / in short, I suggest you get a lawyer – I didn’t want it to be like this, / but this complete loss of innocence – / we can’t let it go, we’ve got to finish it. / He makes me sick! I hate him. He hates her. / Got to get me some paper. / Got to work and just labor, / so there’s food on the table, / and her life is stable. / Let me tell you, she’s amazing; / her mind is fire, blazing. / We’re both so frustrated, / and feel time is wasted. We’re boxed or just caged in. / This trepidation, / this bad situation, / where the monsters are real. / But, in time she’ll heal. / And God is our shield / in this battlefield. / I don’t want to get up. I just want God to hold me. / Life hurts and it’s tough. I can’t forget what she told me…

Does he tell the truth or lie?
Does he know it’s do or die?
I guess it’s just you and I….
Baby – please don’t cry.
It’ll be all right…
Mama’s gonna fight.
And I’ll hold you tight.
We’ll sleep sound tonight.

It was the worse day of my life. It felt like a knife it cut so deep, / regulating the strife that’s ours to keep. / I could have taken his life, I could have killed that creep. / A lot of people were like, “I would if it were Me.” / I wanted to punch him in his stomach to make him suffer for what he’d done. / But, I did crunches for my stomach. I may act tougher. I’m just stunned. / And my mother taught my daughter how to dial 911, / so, in case of an emergency she could get help to come. / All right – I bought the lies, / I swatted the flies, / I heard her cries, / I saw the pain in her eyes, / no alibis… / Lord make me wise! / Untie these ties I try to hide. / I’ll abide by Your side. You stick by mine. / You make me shine: / a sight for the blind / and a light for Your kind. / Please! Guard her mind, and mine. / I want to press rewind / I want to turn back time.
I can’t deal with all this drama. / I can’t believe they called it trauma, / neglect. / They haven’t said what it is yet.