A Mother's Infinite Love & Its Return

Actually, I should have included in my comments that Ethan’s mother was having a very rough pregnancy. I would certainly agree that there are certain biological imperatives provided by a mother, which a father cannot provide, however, I don’t buy that there is anything inherently better or more essential about a mother’s love.

This, of course, will vary in individual cases. A mother who is addicted to, say crack, or who is inclined to psychological abuse, can fill the table with physical and psychic wounds that one would assume a father lacking such proclivities would hopefully avoid.

Also, there is certainly a sense in which our society continues to perpetuate certain prejudices against fathers, which may have individual affects in spite of however erroneous they may be. Perhaps I am even guilty of such an extention of prejudice, given that the intention of the poem was specifically to address the future mother’s pain and distress by way of indicating a certain priviledge to her in the indefinite aftermath of the pregnancy. For I would ask with equal sincerity, how does one measure a father’s love: a question that I would like to believe, again on a case by case basis, is just as unquantifiable. Thanks, Chris—-Rusty

Now that is a great idea Charma. Mom, if you are out there in your half-disguise, thank you. I certainly know that YOU alone were the parent who taught me about the true gift of love and sacrafice, my expressed desires that neither parent’s love be a matter of employing the devices of a recipe of quanity of fuel, unfortunately failing to apply in this case. Thanks, Charma—Love, RBG

Shar, as I indicate to Trenchtown above, I would like to think that there is no more sufficient tool for the quantification of a father’s love for his child. Ideally, there is no more infinite nor profound expansion of feeling on the part of either parent for a her/his child. I must, nonetheless, thank you for your comments, which are uniquely consistent and valuable. Love, Rusty

Quite a compliment, for which I thank you. The reality of a child is almost always somewhat attenuated for the father until the actual birth of a child, at least in my experience-though I must admit to having only one natural child. It is after birth, after the biological mandate of the maternal connection, at which the situation can change. Although I would imagine that this is less than more frequent, I certainly know of situations where, due to any number of reasons, a mother has ceded the “authority” and priviledge for the child to the father in such a way that it appears to be-to extend my original assumption, which I take it you share—”unnatural.” (I must admit, however, to being somewhat uncomfortable with this term, as it is often abused, especially for political or religious purposes, the clear connotation being that whatever is not natural is inferior or perverted. For example, the easily refuted argument that homosexuality is “unnatural” and, therefore, bad. This is a serious conflation of terms, as if anything not of nature is, again, inferior or perverted. If such were the case, then the very presses or computers employed to make such arguments would themselves be open to the very same objections, not being instances of any natural kind. Or, to acknowledge my idiocy in an earlier comment to you, could only be said to belong to a “genus” one of the prime characterictics of which is that it is artificial or made by humans. If you will pardon my philosophico-political digression.
The poem was initiated by a strong feeling of compassion with my former partner. The pregnancy had gone badly in medical and psychological terms. It was an attempt to put pains of pregnancy, which certainly begin long prior to the initiation of labor, into a more positive context. Love, Rusty

We are absolutely cool, Shar. I just enjoy being the contrarian; it’s in my blood. Love, RBG

Danka, my friend. I appreciate your comments, as always. Chow, RBG

First of all, I apologize for the delay in responding to you. I have been taking a hiatus in order to deal with more pressing issues. That does not detract from the fact, however, I am honored that you have featured me in Art and Dis(ease). Thank you, for your recognition Cassidy. Rusty