red sugar

Author: bellmusker
Word Count: 489
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red sugar

It’s so dark inside the wolf
Brothers Grimm

When I moved home from Europe and unpacked my boxes, I found my red coat again

Her red coat, really.

I was nineteen the last time I’d worn it so I didn’t scowl at the loose button, or how it stretched across the bust. She was always much skinnier than me, after all, especially once the wolf came knocking.

She’d told me she’d come back for it. It’s just that she didn’t have the money for him, and he was knocking soon, and she really, really needed him tonight. And I could take the coat as payment, if only I’d answer the knock for the both of us.

She’d come back for it; of course she would.

I keep the collar turned up when I wear it now, at 36. Sometimes, I don’t even feel the cold.

But other times, I feel it in my bones.

red sugar belongs to the following groups:

A New Aesthetic.... Divine and Otherwise , Melbourne & Victoria, Short stories - Spherical Scriptings, The Red Writing Room, The Word Tree and WMG

Ebony and Ruby walked the same path.

They didn’t walk it in the same manner.

Ebony took small steps with dancing feet, and kept her eyes on the path through the forest ahead. Ruby wore heavy boots and stomped hard, one eye over her shoulder at every twig snapping behind them.

Ebony had no fear, and Ruby had no shame.

The wolf sat up and took notice.

He had yellowed teeth that dug into his lip and claws that dug into his palms. He sat up straight when he heard their footsteps, he narrowed his lupine eyes, and he knew what to do.

Wolves always do.

Maidens think they know the dance; think they can sway, and flounce, and strew cherry blossoms in his fur. They think they can giggle with plump little hands over ripe little mouths, and even the wiliest of wolves will be seduced. All maidens are certain, deep down in the reddest pulsing chamber of their hot juicy hearts, that they can walk through the forest unscathed.

And wolves laugh.

A wolf laughs from the back of his throat, a sound like thunder in the darkest of hills where moss doesn’t grow. Wolves laugh, and they sit up straight, and rub their hairy paws together. They reach for their basket, throw in pale dust and cold silver, and slink from their hut into the forest.

Ebony stepped with eyes ahead, and Ruby stomped with eyes behind. And the wolf sauntered in from the side, so that neither saw him coming.

Twigs snapped right there on the forest floor.

Branches cracked like bones breaking.

Birds fled past the treetops and flooded the skies.

And when the mewling stopped, and his paws padded through the undergrowth, only one of them stood.

Ruby in a blood red coat, staring down with hands over mouth at a pile of wet bones, picked clean and spat back to earth. She’d always known Ebony was the ripe one, the girl with succulent flesh and no fear. The wolf had made one ravenous lick along Ruby’s cheek and paused, red rimmed eyes unblinking.

She knew she had too little sugar, too much venom, and a backbone too rigid to snap. One slide of a sandpaper tongue along quivering skin and he knew it too.

So he’d turned to the girl who was easier to swallow, as wolves always do.

Some girls just stick in your throat, and you can’t wash them down.

Ruby stopped walking in the forest. She takes paths with few shadows and stomps hard; keeps her ears pricked and fists clenched. And though she loves the hood of her red coat, can smell the damp earth of the forest in its lining and hear the rustling of leaves as she walks, she never strides with the hood up anymore.

Wolves have padded paws, you see.

You can’t always hear them coming.

Yasemin Sumner

Oh Bell. There is a lupine lump in my throat. This is magic of the Grimm kind indeed, and I knew as you spoke about writing this piece what it would mean to me. But I had no idea the tingles would get right through to my bones.
Sleep easy, little red one, we all do the best we can in them there woods.
(and you know, I can’t help but laugh at the swirls in the grass indeed, I just this minute finished a piece about a snake.) xxxx
bellmusker replied

I hope I’ve done your treasured wolf justice; I know you’ll weave your magic with my beloved serpent. I’ll sleep well tonight, having finally coughed this up…...those swirls in the grass are sooooo cosy! X
Lisa Jewell

Makes me wonder how much of Ebony and how much of Ruby is left….....

Fantastic writing as always, Dearest Bell…...in fact I was transfixed and perhaps I’m reading way too much into this piece.

There is a tale-likeness, a bit of sinister, a dash of vitriol, recognition, life and its colourful cloak….

Fuck, I just love this and once again, after reading you….........I want MORE… XOXOX
bellmusker replied

Ah babe, to this day I don’t know just what happened to Ebony. And you know me well enough to read pretty much all that I intended into this, I think…..I love your analysis. X
Ariane

What a mesmorizing read – brilliant. wise, poignant and funny.
bellmusker replied

Thanks Ariane; such a wonderful comment. I did always shiver at Little Red Riding Hood….now I know why, hey?
friartuck

Ah Belle – there will come a day when writer’s will be bowing down to the Bellmusker, Goddess of The Written Word – in dark red shrines lit by black candles, and we’ll be standing up the back sayin’ “Yeah, we knew her when she was mortal…”. You tell a story like no-one else…
bellmusker replied

Trust the hecklers to always stand at the back ;-) Thanks, dear Kloose. Now that winter’s over I can put away my red coat….just needed to get this out first. Sweet dreams to you….
Enivea

All I can say is hear! hear! to friartuck’s comment :-))
bellmusker replied

Many thanks, Enivea…...much appreciated, though you often make me blush :-)
TheWanderingBoo

Absolutely brilliant…you are a great story teller…pure genius
I simply adore reading your work
Flic Manning

“Twigs snapped right there on the forest floor.

Branches cracked like bones breaking.

Birds fled past the treetops and flooded the skies.”

What winderful descriptions!
divareVeur

OOOOOHHHHHHHH! love this story and it is really oh so true! chills! xxoooo
T SOUL

All maidens are certain, deep down in the reddest pulsing chamber of their hot juicy hearts, that they can walk through the forest unscathed.

And wolves laugh.

Oh how true, how true!!!
Jessica Tremp

oh, this breaks my heart a little…and i love the ending…x
you are a clever little red thing x
LittleHelen

How brilliant…my eyes were open wide like a childs throughout the whole story!.. :D
Some girls just stick in your throat, and you can’t wash them down I can only imagine how true that would be. Once again delectable atory telling sweet Bell xxx
PJ Ryan

You write so brilliantly Bell and with such sensuality and so sharpely succinct .. just mesmerizing .. xx
Matthew Dalton

That’s some talent you’ve got there. I wish I knew how you wrote like that. I hope you write more soon.
jcaputo

This is an amazing piece. I loved every word. You have a fantastic talent. Good work!
bellmusker replied

Thanks so much – am pleased you like it!
drpepper73

goosebumps big time. Love it!
bellmusker replied

Thanks lovely girl – just don’t read this particular fairy tale to Autumn!
aglaia b

oooooh, most excellent.
your descriptions are so good!
;-) xox
bellmusker replied

Ah, I just loved that link! What a menacing yet seductive version of Little Red Riding Hood…...it’s meandering through my head even now, so dark yet so damn beautiful…....thank you!
MissKristy

So he’d turned to the girl who was easier to swallow, as wolves always do.
Some girls just stick in your throat, and you can’t wash them down.

Oh…those lines are gonna stay with me forever. This is a piece I will come back to again and again. How do you do it? Read it to me at Writers meet? Pretty please? xox
bellmusker replied

Sure, if you’d like me to, I’ll read it to you at Sunday’s meeting. You just keep an eye out for wolves when I do though…..never quite know where they’re lurking ;-) x x
staceyc

you are a wonderful story teller….love your work. you have a fan for life
bellmusker replied

God, what a beautiful thing to say! Thank you Stacey, that’s really made me smile and smile.
crowe

“A wolf laughs from the back of his throat, a sound like thunder in the darkest of hills where moss doesn’t grow.”

Oh yeah.
crowe

I saw about six of these guys in court today.
bellmusker replied

Oh lord, that comment made my stomach lurch.

Clearly, you know exactly what I mean. This is precisely why I don’t wear my hood up anymore…..oops, I mean Ebony. Thanks for commenting; it’‘ll remain in my mind for quite some time.
dirtycitypigeon

wow. i actually heard the twigs breaking
bellmusker replied

So glad to hear that! It was my first reworking of a fairy tale; pleased I managed to convey the menace.
Care

I don’t know what to say…but I’ve read it through three times now…brilliant writing…I was captivated : )
bellmusker replied

Thanks, Care….captivation is pretty much the best reaction to invoke in your readers! Such a lovely thing to say :-)
Joyce Dickens,...

WOW.......Captivating indeed….so well written, full of suspense and very dynamic and thought provoking….......Excellent!
bellmusker replied

Cheers, Joyce….much appreciated!
Alex Brown

a new side to an old story, albeit more adult. this is disturbingly real, the way it should be. yet another wonderous piece to feed your hungry fans :D
bellmusker replied

Thanks so much, Alex…it’s the disturbingly real stories that kick us in the heart the most, I tend to think.

I always smile when I see your comments strewn my way :-)
nnimus3

you are fantastic. I’m going to go feast on the rest of your work.
Elva

I would like to leave a comment, however anything and everthing I write feels indeniably inadequate. Clarissa Pinkola Estes and her book “Women who runs with the Wolves” comes to my mind, however your writing stirs something even deeper. Veils that hid instictual awareness being blown aside. I feel as though I’ve been half asleep. Thanks for the electric shock treatment.
bellmusker replied

Thanks so damn much for your wonderful comments on my work! And thanks for the mention of Clarissa Pinkola Estes; she’s a marvel, and any comparison to her storytelling makes me shine. I really appreciate your words, Elva :-)
Jared D White

beautifully dark and vivid!
bellmusker replied

Thanks Jared! I’m a bit behind on responding to comments, sorry – am currently in Iceland, swilling schnapps and watching the aurora borealis dance across the sky – but appreciate your words. Cheers!
Jared D White

wow, i’m really jealous now! (I’m in Pennsylvania with a cold)
bearpaw

Belle you have no equal, your words have me transfixed and delivered into another world…
bellmusker replied

Thank you so much, sweetheart. And please excuse the late reply, just flew back into Melbourne today. Happy to see your message though!
mistletoes

This is absolutely BRILLIANT!!!!!!!!
bellmusker replied

Thanks so much! What a wonderful comment to read :-)
samara108

This a great version of a fairy tale! i love the surreal humor…

“Some girls just stick in your throat, and you can’t wash them down.” (great lines throughout)

Excellent! :)
bellmusker replied

Ah, that’s what happens when you have a touch too much bile – they can’t manage to swallow you! Various people have told me their interpretation of what the wolf symbolises, and it always intrigues me.

You have to love those Brothers Grimm tales, hey? Thanks for the comment!
stupidland

you’re a painter!
bellmusker replied

Thanks so much, Darby! I usually think in black ink, but here the brushstrokes needed so much more.

I felt somewhat melancholy packing away my little red riding coat this summer…..never quite know when I’ll need it.

Hope your xmas was rich and joyous :-)
stupidland

too many great lines, but this is my fave i think: “They think they can giggle with plump little hands over ripe little mouths, and even the wiliest of wolves will be seduced.”

you should see ‘freeway” reece witherspoon and kiefer sullivan, great reappropriation of the myth. one of my fave movies. scary and warped.

hope your christmas was great too! :)
fullcirclemand...

omg omg omg – this is a true and utter treat for my heart and my mind!
ambient-1

This reads like the path through the forest. It just leads you on and on to the end. Wonderfully visual. I couldn’t help feeling a little bit like a wolf myself.

“with plump little hands over ripe little mouths.”
Delicious! Love this!
bellmusker replied

Thanks so much, Robert. I hadn’t really looked at it from the wolf’s perspective – I’ve had a touch too much experience with wolves for that to make me comfortable – but I’m always happy to coax an engaged reaction from a reader. Glad you like it – I think Ruby might have as much attitude as your wonderful Christina!
LindaR

now this is perhaps the better story telling we should give our girls ~ certainly speaks volumes in exquisite words that have all the flavor and taste of truth! bravo on such a writing ~ I will be back to read more :) xx
bellmusker replied

Thanks so much Linda; I don’t know how the Brothers Grimm would find my take on their classic tale, but it speaks volumes for me. Glad you enjoyed it!
rubyjo

hey, i gotta love this one :)
so talented
bellmusker replied

Thanks so much….I really appreciate it :-)
seeker19

Love this interpretation of the story – so much in there to think about :)
bellmusker replied

Thanks! What intrigues me about this is that different people have interpreted my version so many different ways….I love hearing about them. Cheers!
gemmalemma

Ebony stepped with eyes ahead, and Ruby stomped with eyes behind. And the wolf sauntered in from the side, so that neither saw him coming.

The portrayal of the contrast of the two characters is a thing of beauty. I really enjoyed reading this, it’s one of those things that brings a huge smile to your lips as you read, no matter how venomous it ends up being. Wonderful job.
bellmusker replied

Gemma, my writing seems to often contain a weft of venom, no matter how much I aim for the light. Hmmm, I wonder why? :-) Thank you for your comment, I’m pleased you enjoyed this.
amanda marx

love it . . .love the fairytale, love the metaphore . . . love ruby & ebony but how could you not . . .
beautiful writing
xXx
bellmusker replied

I’ve always been partial to this tale, and its rich colours and quiet menace. I’m so glad you feel I’ve done it justice. Thanks, Amanda! x
charliethetramp

how about the ones in sheeps clothing,how do they fare in the forest?
well writen morality tale with perceived wisdom
bellmusker replied

Ah, they have hidden indentations under the moss where they curl up and make their plans, tails flicking….and they always hit hardest.

But then, I think even I own sheeps clothing on some days…don’t we all? Thanks for your comment, I appreciate it :-)
tracyxkeema

you tell a great tale, genuinely captivating x
bellmusker replied

Thanks Tracy…..I’m pleased you enjoy this!
raymondoantonio

FUCKING BRILLIANT!! STRONG, PERFECT PROSE!!!!
bellmusker replied

Thank you! What a lovely comment to read first thing in the morning :-)
Kai-Marie Will...

magical, wonderful work
bellmusker replied

Thanks so much! The Brothers Grimm always have a place on my mantlepiece; this is one more version of a tale that’s long captured my attention. Cheers :-)