Shall I see tomorrow?
For Vaughan, whose grace touched all who knew him
20th October 2007
Shall I see tomorrow? belongs to the following groups:
Compassion, Courage & FriendshipFear shakes my core,
quakes me
collapses me
In dust is memory, in ruin lies dream
- Infernal fury burns them,
thrusts its heat in-to and out-of me
Endless flames of pointless rage
send my hands a-trembling
so they cannot hold a conversation with themselves.
When should I wake tomorrow?
Should I chill my marrow
in the night’s cool breath?
Should I climb the highest point
in the horizon’s sunset dream
and watch the sunrise in rapture and despair?
Nature’s fabric has been rent!
Tear the Stars from their velvet cloth
Let me eat them
Let the Moon watch me
- will she cry, will she weep
That I have eaten her children?
- will she understand that I too will be consumed?
Forgetting, forgotten,
the wasted fury of life upon me
- I am shredded, bowed and burnt before you
What should I take with me?
What should I leave behind?
What questions do I ask,
or answer?
or leave those behind and “nevermore” be uttered from my lips.
But I will lie, I will be still now!
Basking in the blaze of the morning Sun
Burn myself on the sandy beaches tomorrow
and let the ocean waves balm my ethereal wounds
I will lie, and those who need,
will come
I will Speak
I will say tomorrow to my loves
I will say yesterday to my lovers
and as my mind wanders beyond time and space
Peace will come to me
Let that last breath on that fatal shore
rise over the winds and carry me
beyond hurt, beyond tear
and in your memory
bear me home
Thus so,
My final Prayer is heard
by none and all
and not of all
by me.
Suzanne German
Ashley – how beautiful! I work on Oncology and Neurology Wards and, inevitably work with patients and their families at the end of their life – which is moving and sad – especially for the patients.
Your words are so honouring of the plight of so many people – and really acknowledges their experience with respect, dignity and profound understanding.
Humanity is both amazing and fragile at once – and your words are testimony to this.
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I attended a moving charity event last night in cambrige – ‘Relay for Life’ – Cancer Research UK – at 9pm there were a few ‘words’ read out for all the candles that were lit around the lake and representing a person who had lost the battle to cancer.
The survivors walked the first lap – it was a really emotional and wonderful experience which gave some hope for humanity and its search for more knowledge and understanding of this disease.
loved your poem
Suzanne
David Haviland
Very well written and so full of emotion.
Suzanne German
I read this again today Ashley – and I again I though it’s great that you have written this.
You really illustrates the impact that the transition from life to death can have on those working in the medical field and reminds us all of the strength, fragility and dualities within humanity.
I hope to read more of your work here!
Thanks for sharing this with us
Suzanne
Ashley Ng
Thanks again Suzanna for visiting again. Your words are again very kind.
Silvia Manuela
Powerful,wonderfully written, evocative poem.
Ashley Ng replied
Thank you very much for your comments Silvia