SMOR GOLF TOURNEY 11-19-2008
Article written, based on flier inflormation, for either the San Manuel Miner or Copper Basin News.
SMOR Golf Tourney Invite with Explanatory Notes for Non-Golfers.
If you are already a golfer, and Chamber supporter, please feel free to skip over the majority of this article, and to hone in on the relevant facts, as are concerned with the time, place, fees, etc. of the tournament to which you are cordially invited. For the rest of you, consider this your beginning primer, as we step boldly into learning the secret rites and arts of golf.
Now, here’s an interesting piece of news which just came across my desk: Fellow golfers and Chamber supporters are cordially invited to participate in the 6th SMOR Chamber of Commerce Golf Tournament. I’ve read such things before, but usually only in connection with ‘This ‘n’ That’; not to write an article about, mostly. What made it especially interesting was that, at first, I just read “You are invited to participate” and did not see that I was excluded by a dire lack of knowledge, experience, and willingness to, apparently, hold up members of the Chamber of Commerce while they relax between putts.
That is what they mean by “Chamber supporters”, yes? Well, perhaps not; but, really, this points to a problem. I shall never be invited because I am not “a fellow golfer”. When I read about tournament formats, I get lost as soon as I realize they haven’t mentioned jousting, or roses, once. On the off chance that there are others out there in the community, that like myself, grew up golf deprived and therefore unable to hone their body to a state of physical fitness, and spiritual grace, to serve the Chamber of Commerce, I thought I would do a little research and share what I have learned.
First of all, let us examine the relevant fact; golfers read here:
The 6th SMOR Chamber of Commerce Golf Tournament will be held at Saddlebrooke West golf course on Saturday, November 22nd.
For business who want their name in the forefront, hole sponsorship is available at a cost of $50. Signs advertising your business will be prominently displayed. Registration begins at Noon. The putting contest begins at 12:30 pm, with a shotgun start at 1 pm. Entries will be limited to the first 24 teams. Registrations must be received by November 18th. Sponsorship tickets must be received by November 8th. You are also urged to provide door prizes for the raffle drawing.
Tournament format will be a 4-person scramble, at an entry fee of $240 per team. The entry fee, which breaks down to $60 per person, includes green fees, cars, range balls, free drinks on course, and a goody bag filled with extras. Raffle tickets, mulligan, and putting contests will be available at an additional cost.
Now, this lovely flier, where I got the information above from, says that for further information, Bob Lee can be contacted at 385-4807. But, it also says make checks payable to SMOR Chamber of Commerce, P.O. Box 416, San Manuel, AZ 85631. I am not quite sure if I can afford to call Bob Lee for more information, since I don’t know how big the check would need to be; also, it’s bound to take a long time if I have to wait for the check to clear. If it weren’t already well past 9 pm I might take the chance on calling him, on an IOU basis, but, maybe only golfers who have the wherewithal to support an entire chamber, can call.
So, in this mood of uncertainty, I decided to forgo calling Bob Lee, and to, instead, look up information on various bits of golf terminology that keep cropping up in my work, but which I haven’t, yet, gotten a clue as to the meaning of. This then, is the promised notes for non-golfers, who still want some basic information.
The 4 man scramble has long been a mystery to me, for years. I often imagine it has something to do with the Three Stooges, only, of course, they would also have to invite Groucho Marx to join in. This could explain a lot, in regards to why, even though some women do play it and play it well, golf remains primarily a man’s game. Certainly the Three Stooges remain, primarily, shows for men. As it turns out, however, according to my studies, the 4 man Scramble is not at all related to the Three Stooges; unless you play the game very, very fast.
4 Man Scramble: Teams consist of four players: One low handicapper who is captain of the foursome, and three other players to be determined. The contest is based upon one ball score without handicap so the teams are based upon the combined handicap total within the foursome. Each player hits a tee shot and the team selects one drive and then all four players hit a second shot from that spot. This procedure is repeated until a ball or balls have been hit onto the green. One ball is selected on the green and all four players then putt from the spot and repeat this procedure until the ball is holed for a team score on that hole. This is then repeated for all eighteen holes for a team total score. Each player’s tee shot must be used at least three times during the eighteen holes.
There are, of course, variations to these basic rules, depending on where you are competing, whom with, and how many chambers you must hold up during the lulls, but that is the gist of how that particular tournament format is played.
Mulligan: I didn’t need to look this one up. This is a rich and hearty stew, originally from the Scots just like where golf came from, which is traditionally served somewhere around the middle of the game For it is about the middle of the game when the players were, also traditionally, halfway frozen by rain and wind. Even though that sort of weather seldom happens in this neck of the cacti, the tradition still holds sway and all four men, of any given scramble, from the beginning play a hearty game in hope of hurrying onward toward that first delicious sip of Mulligan!
See, there, we are all on our way to being “fellow golfers”. Now, how big is this chamber I have to support, and can I wear a weight lifting belt to help out?
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