We have reviewed your application and are delighted to accept your latest bout of depression.
As your recognized authority on the ‘Black Dog’ it is our undertaking to be the conductor of how your dark canine walks you through the next weeks, months and if your dog is particularly hungry even years.
How long you remain in a collar and chain is up to you however.
A requirement of this new depression contract in keeping with the collective standards is to hide your Black dog as much as possible as it is unsettling for some members of the community.
In fact if you could manage to break a limb so there is a visible wound in need of healing this is really more palatable and will offer more assistance and acceptance to you on a social level.
If you would like to itemize and prove the cost of grooming and caring for your black dog we will consider reimbursing some serotonin at some designated time period, unknown currently.
If at some point there is a secondary infection of depression the contract will be extended accordingly to meet these requirements.
We will not offer hope or remedies as the contract is quite clear in the fine print relating to changes in brain chemistry, environmental causes and genetic inheritance will be adhered to.
Well, we wish you all the best and remind that this is a singular depression one that is unique to your life script and cannot be compared or shared with another applicant to be of greater or lesser degree.With best wishes
Yours faithfully© K S Hardy 2010
Just another application processed…..
And their are more applicants than we realize.
And some can hide so very well.