Yes, all good things in time –I know. I’m not running off or away… but just changing the nature of many things that have needed change for a while. All things happen for a reason; all events that occur do not occur out of time and therefore they affect each moment and person that they touch. To ignore that or not examine it is to deny the need to grow in every thing we do and that affects us.
This experience, though nauseating, is bringing me ideas, thoughts and questions that I either didn’t ask or chose not to address. This is a good thing because I think I’ve shied away from a number of things I need to be better at, stronger at and that will get me to the point in my heart and soul that I can not only be great as an individual but also be great for others I share my life with.
None of this is me complaining or whining. No “boo-hoo, perfect harmony eludes me” :-) I have many times said that conflict is a milestone of civilization despite the various grotesqueries it can entail; and so it is true as well for our souls and spiritual growth.
Externally this has brought about a much more acute vision, for me, in a manner of high specificity for those people that are indeed “good”. Even though the mass moves, mostly, amenably to one another there are only a handful that have “the right stuff” You are, without question, one of those few. This is just as important as any other realization because as my life moves on (as all of our lives move on) we’ll be able to go beyond any one place –perhaps even together and in parallel.
That, to me, is the diamond in the rough of life. Because change will come and it will not be stopped. No person or place is safe from it –not one. The trick in making it through is in going with it and not trying to escape it. The bulk of my life has been built on a blessed foundation of such a thing. Living with that concept is what taught me to adapt, fight and soar where others wouldn’t for fear of the ground not being there when they returned… and the difference that always separated me from them, in the end, wasn’t that I knew they were wrong or pointlessly full of fear… but that I simply never planned on coming back down to the ground again, myself.
This is not a legend to become but a legacy in its infancy…