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Everything Upchuck (45 results)

You Make Me Hurl - on darks by Andi Bird

THIS is what I do.NSFW

High Street Haiku – The Phonebox.We all got mobiles. / They are dead important though. / Good for pissing in.

The Shitterbox Part 2 – (T.V Guide)Featuring: CELEBRITY CUM BRINE WITH ME, MANKY GENITAL SUPERSTORE, MUD RAPISTS, LIVE BAROMETER ACTION and MORE!

High Street Haiku – The Train StationTrain Station Depression.

Drunk Ceiling by Al Bourassa

Feeling A Little Green Around The Gills by Al Bourassa

Those Tabloid Headline In Full… Tues 16th N…“CHEGGAZ BEGGAZ MEGGA PREGGAZ”, “MCDOWELL TO FOUL COWELL’S TOWEL” / and more….

High Street Haiku – Antique ShopDusty old bollocks

The Day Nothing Worked.The day nothing worked started rather late for me. I couldn’t be sure of the exact time I awoke as my alarm clock had stopped at exactly m…

High Street Haiku – The Cyclist.Saving the planet / You look like a right dickhead / ’Spose someone has to

High Street Haiku – The Postmanyeah. postmen.

High Street Haiku – Clock-towerScowling down from high / A municipal time-piece / You’re ten minutes slow

Peace Statue by mattupchuck

High Street Haiku – RoadkillPainting the town red? / What a shame that you are not / Re-cy-cle-a-ble

High Street Haiku – Bagpiping Buskeryeah

High Street Haiku – SubwayBig Sign Says “Subway” / Not the useful one you ride / Odd smelling baguettes.

Finding the Way Back by mattupchuck

Brighton Pier by mattupchuck

High Street Haiku – The Bin.Yeah.

High Street Haiku – Kebabs Open LateMiscellaneous meat / Grimy floor tiles, stained ceiling / Smells like cheap dog food

Your Definitive Guide To PetsNSFW

High Street Haiku – Sainsbury’s LocalThe Sainsbury’s Local / Is not what it says it is / It is miles away

I Am The Official New Face the Milk Marketing Boa…NSFW

High Street Haiku – ParkingNSFW

High Street Haiku – Shopping CentreHuge shopping centre / Lots of ghastly shops I can / Ignore all at once

High Street Haiku – H&MVery loud music / Wearing mass produced fashion / People look the same

High Street Haiku – Blockbuster VideosClosed up shop now yeah? / All the shitty films have gone / Your block’s been busted

Leading Homosexual Outed As Conservative.Dennis Hogg MP (major poofter) was secretly filmed by a Sunday tabloid newspaper meeting a seedy man in what was described as a “Cons…

High Street Haiku – ArgosLoads of catalogues / Pages of shit tents and that / “Not in stock, sorry.”

High Street Haiku – Lloyd’s TSBYou’ve got a damn nerve / Selling more shit mortgages / Like nothing happened

Matt Upchuck by mattupchuck

High Street Haiku – Charity MuggerCorners me alone / Save The Children need my help. / Yeah? I hate children

High Street Haiku – The Bus Stop.Yeah

High Street Haiku – Vomit PoolYeah

An Open Letter To Channel 5I would like to congratulate you for implementing the return of the remarkably talented Vanessa Feltz to our television screens.

You Make Me Hurl - on lights by Andi Bird

ITV’s “Take Me Out” – Feb…NSFW

High Street Haiku – Petrol Station Mini-Mar…Some squashed sandwiches / Been kicked around the floor by / Resentful employees.

High Street Haiku – GamestationYou’re looking tatty / Missing a letter there mate / Sign reads “amestation”

“The Shitterbox” Part 1 – (T.V …NSFW

High Street Haiku – The 99p ShopHow much is that mate? / Ninety-nine pence is it yeah? / Oi! What about this?

High Street Haiku – Man giving out flyers“Pound off a Big Mac?” / Thanks but no thanks mate / I would rather eat my shoes

Upchuck by HumanJoseph

High Street Haiku – Police Community OfficerFighting knife crime yeah? / But without any handcuffs? / Good luck to you mate.

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