Catal Hayuk: The City Before It’s Time Deep within the Anatolian plane lies a sprawling ruin; a long dead city called Catal Hayuk. It was built by an eccentric merchant as a stor… Rain of Zombies We cross now to Annie Cropley, reporting live from Yorkshire, where the local residents are apparently experiencing some unusual weather. A… Talk to the hand because the face ain’t lis… It is perhaps the most obnoxious phrase to ever grace the human oral tradition. Many of us have said it at least once in our lives; whether… Dysfunctional In the bowels of some unnamed, industrial puddle of cat sick, sits the kind of restaurant whose “Family Style” logo was erected… McDonald’s Swirling chairs of children, on sugar highs, / Elderly couples, slowly masticating their apple pies. / Never ask for chips, they only have … I Want to Pants Them Every time I see a pair walking around the town / Droopy, messy, sloppy / Dragging on the ground / Every time I see a pair I want to … Appreciation 1. Why so grumpy? / 2. It’s nothing. / 1. Yes, it is… I can tell. Ice Cream Friday Something had taken over. Debbie Pincer felt the same way. Lester was sitting in his own urine. On Meeting My Aquaintance I’ve chanced upon a woman this night; / Spied ‘cross the room she looks just right.